andyxroo-deactivated20110115 asked: "Him: You have all of these secrets. There's me, there's your Internet life. There's things you do that most of your friends don't know about. Then you have your open social life. Who are you really? When will I meet the real you?
Me: I... really don't know anymore."
Does it ever bother you? I was there once... To be honest I'm still there. I've spent so much time being a liar, a great liar, that I think its a big deal when I'm honest and it kills me. It should be hard to be honest, especially to the ones I love. How do you deal with it?
There’s times when the lying gets to me. Only when I feel the urge to just shout to the people who think they know me, that they really don’t. You can’t know anybody, really. Everyone has their secrets that they keep. Even from their closest friends. So to say you know someone just makes you sound foolish. & that power… knowing I have these others ‘lives’ to fall back on. To go live without other people knowing. It’s a good feeling in a way. I can talk to my brothers or friends about something, all the while thinking they have no clue where I really go when I say I’m leaving. All of these lives put together make the real me. I can see it, no one else can. Me being able to see it is what matters. Just as long as I don’t lose sense of reality.